abandoned blogs horror of pregnancy

I have many blogs that I abandoned.  The first had a great name, but  I invited people I know to read it.  What a mistake and what possessed me to do that?  The second blog was abandoned because I connected it to my email account.  I fear google plus sending a notice to the people in my inbox that I have a blog, the horror.

Some of the posts are funny though, and I want to cut and paste them here.  I can, I will, I have time.  I don't work much and am in general an unbusy person.  If I don't move all the blog posts, it is because I am lazy, which is possible.

This account is just for junk, no one knows I use it, and I can write this  public, secret, electronic diary to myself without fear of discovery.

Today I want to talk about being pregnant.  I am you see and I regret it.  Probably right now, the worst decision of my life.  Mothers make a pact, they swear never to tell undivided maidens, like me, what it is really like being pregnant, for if they did no maiden would ever bear another child.  I have never felt worse in my life.  My digestive system has shut down.  I went four days with out shitting.  I spent a whole day in pain so amorphous and never ending, I wept in agony and despair.  I just sat on the couch and balled and wept in pain and in anticipation of days of pain that would never end.  I cannot digest food, and it is giving me bovine style gas, which is trapped inside me, making all movements uncomfortable.  I am belching uncontrollably and out of proportion of what I am eating.  My back hurts.  I have a headache.  I am tired, very tired.  I sleep 12 hours a day.  I wake up and feel like I was run over in the middle of the night.  Now I am hungry.  Since eating is not producing shit, I have cut my calories to about 800 a day.  Yes, bad I know.  But not as bad as indigestion that causes me to weep.  I have to pee 100 times a day, and I wake up repeatedly at night.  When I pee, I pray for blood and a miscarriage.  Awful, I know.  But this is just week seven.  Seven.  It is not going to get better.  Everything smells bad, I am nauseated  by everything, but I never throw up.  All this suffering and I bet it is a girl.  A girl, who will have to go through all this horror one day.  I will tell her, I will tell her not to do it.

I am having my tubes tied after this.  $150 co-pay.  Should be money well spent.